"The Longest Day" or "What am I doing here?"

Note: meant to post this last night, but was too wiped

I am sooo tired today after doing practically nothing.

First thing this morning I went with a client to the Courthouse to attend a free legal clinic. It is one of those places where you take a number then wait. And wait. And wait some more. Three hours later we saw the clerk for about 5 minutes (she was very helpful) before we got out of that place.

5 minutes to eat my lunch (yay! what luck!)

Afternoon spent tracking down the next client (inner monologue: I just saw him just yesterday, and rearranged my schedule to help him out today, wtf is the big idea disappearing now grr), then taking a long drive through traffic to get him to a treatment session at a downtown hospital. That clinic was running late so we waited. And waited. And dozed off….*snork* wha? What happened, where am I? Oh, and waited…I brought a book this time, so at least I was entertained when he finally went in for his appointment. And I waited. And texted my boss to beg her mercy for missing a team meeting I was supposed to be at right that minute. 2.5 hours spent before we left.

Then waded back into traffic for the long slog to get him home. Only to turn around and head right back into it to finally arrive at MY home where I try to reflect on the ways that I helped today.

What a day.

Standard of Care

I’ve been absent.

Thanksgiving weekend was spent mostly in bed, feeling sick. I took the Friday before and the Tuesday after off work, all for a stupid little cold.

I think work burn out had something to do with my reduced immune system.

One of my clients has recently been diagnosed with cancer, and I’ve been putting a lot of energy into supporting him. Practical stuff has been taking up most of our time – getting to appointments, arranging new supports, making sure he has food in the house. I saw or spoke to him 2-3 times every day for about three weeks.

One bright spot in this experience has been visiting the oncology unit. That sounds so wrong, but wow! What a difference from the mental health units! Prior to this, they were the only parts of this particular hospital I had been in.

I walked in to a sunny, bright reception area. The nurses’ desk was open, and there was somebody to greet me, who actually looked me in the eye, and didn’t just pretend that they couldn’t see me through the glass while they type away on their computer. In fact, there was no glass! The nurses were happy to admit me in, without having met me before.

They came over to check on my client while I was there speaking to him. The nurse introduced herself, and talked about how we could support him together. My client had lots of space and privacy (well, as much privacy as a curtain can offer, but still…) while he received his chemo treatment. When leaving, the nurses told me to call if I needed any information.

I did call later in the week, and someone got back to me the same day with helpful information. The following day when I went in with my client, the nurses remembered who I was, and helped us right away with what we’d come for.

Everything about this experience is the polar opposite of how things go in mental health.

It really makes me wonder about how the treatment of these different (although some times the same) patients is valued, and what are the expected outcomes.